Masseyhillph Archive

As you wish. I suggest you try it again, Luke.

What?! The plans you refer to will soon be back in our hands. In my experience, there is no such thing as luck. I’m trying not to, kid. Jedi Academy Don’t act so surprised, Your Highness. You weren’t on any mercy mission this time. Several transmissions were beamed to this ship by Rebel spies. I …

The Itchy and Scratchy and Poochie Show

A lifetime of working with nuclear power has left me with a healthy green glow…and left me as impotent as a Nevada boxing commissioner. Kids, kids. I’m not going to die. That only happens to bad people. Kids, kids. I’m not going to die. That only happens to bad people. Slow down, Bart! My legs …

The Knights Who Say Ni demand a sacrifice!

It’s only a model. No, no, no! Yes, yes. A bit. But she’s got a wart. He hasn’t got shit all over him. Well, Mercia’s a temperate zone! The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite, held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by divine providence that …